Distant Closeness & Close distance


Space and time, being the two most primary dimensions of universe. All that is stagnant, constant and static with respect to these two: “Time” and “Distance”, is what is “The Ultimate Truth”. And all that changes, varies, ascends or descends with these two is what is known as “Illusion”. An illusion does not mean a lie. It means a conditional truth, that becomes a lie only beyond those conditions.

So, the importance “Time” and “Distance” hold in our life is far way more extended that just what we understand it is. Be it your birth, language, family friends, career, relationships or be it your inner voice, conscious, vibe, gut feeling, emotions, decisions or life and death: All are the events and functions mapped upon the planes of some Time and Distance, distinctly or coincidentally.

Today, we live in a routine that’s physically earning us a healthy and a lavish lifestyle whereas, metaphysically, decaying out the style from life making it unhealthy, poor and weak. Is it actually our choice, or is it a By-product coming along with a choice just like the crushed paper or piece of foam coming along with the footwear that we buy from the stores today. What I mean is, who in the world would intentionally carry home such a garbage, but don’t we? May be we do because we do not realize it, or may be because we know that we own a dustbin at our homes too.

In such a lifestyle, at times we lack time or distance or have ample of time and distance unregulated within our jobs, lives,
relationships and self. The point is what is we manage it effectively. Well some online courses, a few webinars and some books flooding the markets for sorting this “Time and Distance Management” are a fashion today. With due respect to all of them, if we understand and learn from it and solve our problem completely, there’s nothing to discuss. But yes, if we are still on the same page fighting issues, with a battle within oneself, but a broad glittering smile on the face, Let’s just face it.

We are social beings and it’s our basic need that people, by themselves take out time for us, put an effort to reduce the distance in-between. This expectation at least from the people, who are important to us goes without saying, which is absolutely normal. Whereas, sometime the reverse is the case. There are people doing this and we want them to retard because we feel we need some distance and time debarring them, what we call our personal space. And again, this is not wrong too. So what is the root cause exactly? Why and how is this a problem?

The world works on Energy, the primary of which is Light Energy from the Sun and similar sources. Even this infinitely powerful energy, that feeds almost the complete universe has a spectrum, the bands of colors and each of them has their limits, both minimum and maximum. We also pertain limits naturally, or must I say we have a threshold (minimum) and a critical/saturation (maximum) value to everything we have, we do, and we live around. For some people and some situations, these values are rigid, predefined and constant, whereas for others they are flexible with some margins and allowances.

Exactly, such are the situations when we become distant with the people we are living closely. Or we become very closely attached to people long distances away. Or while doing our jobs, we get distant and detached to the monotonous work with we do. Or we enjoy even imagining a few passions of ours, that we really did not at all practice in real. This is how events and functions of your life are at par with time and distance.

The point is to QWERTY, i.e., Query, Weigh, Estimate, Realize, Takeover, Yield.

Query– Ask yourself if there’s anything or anyone that’s beyond (plus or minus) your bounds of threshold and critical values of distance and time. If it is not, then accepting it is the right thing to do, as it might be a very instantaneous or temporary issue that will subside soon. Else, Weigh.

Weigh– Is it worthy enough to extend your bounds using allowances. If yes, extend the bounds and accept. Else, Estimate.

Estimate – That’s how you simulate the effects of the situation becoming a cause. Post estimating the probable effects, check once if you can take it and if you are ready to take it.

Realize –  Realize the importance of that thing or that person is the utmost important step. To realize, you got to think from a domain free from time and distance.
You may ask yourself questions like:

What would I do if that person or thing or event terminates from my life just now, that too forever?
How much would it affect me?
How much I am in desperate need to feel that everything in my life is sorted related to that person, thing or event?
Why am I doing this?
Do I really want to make an extra effort to manage this close distance?

and more…

Takeover –  After realizing, you did 80% of it. Now you do the rest by taking over hold of your actions and intentions towards making such an effort by changing either your beliefs, or your opinions or merely your reactions.

Yield – This is the stage where you start bearing the fruits of your planned directional endeavor. This, in turn motivates you to enjoy the richness in closeness with selected people, things and activities that you aspired for. Further, you are proud of the selection and elimination you made to sort the priorities in action of your life.

This serves for contentment in “Close Distance” and limits in selective bounds, “Distant Closeness”.

Living closely distant from distance,
Hiti Sinha


The Great Guiding Glitches

“When walking through the valley,

Did I realize the height of the mountain,

The one that I had just climbed down!

On the day of scorching heat rising,

Did I realize the relief of swift breeze,

The breeze that I never identified earlier!

At the hour of pain, dread, and agony,

Did I realize the courage to bare all of it,

The courage that held me strong until now!

While standing under the relentless rain,

Did I realize the comfort of the leaves,

The leaves shading me from violent rage!

While clutching my death in my arms,

Did I realize all that life had offered me,

Th life that I had been living until then!”

There it is. The address of “The Great Guiding Glitches” lie here, exactly here. That’s where they belong!

Things that are not absolute, are relative! Relative comparison is what makes us understand things far way better. May be that is why, Darkness is defined as the absence of light, and coldness as the absence of heat.

It is not when we have something in abundance, but when we lack that something, do we realize its significance to ultimate sense!

That is how every breath costs for a man on death-bed.

Each drop of water counts for a sore dry throat.

Every pint of sleep counts for severe chronic insomniac.

Single bond holds for a debarred, ostracized orphan.

Only a piece of cloth for a body covered with shame, yet uncovered!

Well, that’s how it works! When we are in ultimate need of it, it becomes a priority automatically. Fulfillment of that priority is ready to take away anything, absolutely anything at its cost, because then every other thing, relatively is worthless at that instance! The next instance then creates a new priority and then another thing is pushed back in the order of priorities and the cycle goes on….

Does that sound like some psychological wisdom or some lessons impractical?

Well they aren’t!

Because if you want to study it statistically or commercially, you may simply understand its analogy with the Share market. The way, at some point of time, governance issues, environmental conditions, lifestyle trends, or big revolutions affect the prices of commodities, the various situations of our life do the same to our priorities. The prices, the importance of the commodities rise and drop with time. Some get introduced and few eliminated. It is all a cycle, every action creates a reaction and acts as an action for inducing another reaction too.

If you wish to understand it scientifically, understand any priority or concept as an object being observed in an environment with dynamic ally changing parameters influencing the behavior of the object. Just as one in a Thermodynamic setup, where temperature, pressure, viscosity, density and many more play significant roles in exactly determining the behavior of the object in focus. It could even be counted as the Model of machine learning depending on various parameters with varying priorities at various point of times giving rise to well evaluated, sorted, important results.

In all these analogies, when we analyze the system i.e., life situations and its possible outcomes without consideration of one particular single factor. It is then that we observe, understand, realize and evaluate suddenly how important has that factor become for attaining most optimal results.

Maximum moments of our lives, we have been involved in creating a life of our dreams, trying to be perfect, building the most optimal solutions. For all the problems of our lives, be it whatever! In these moments, we need exactly what we are lacking or ignoring then so as to sought the most optimal, near to perfect solution. That lacking or ignored factor could be patience, peace, self-control, endurance, faith, hope, happiness, strength, courage or anything that it takes you to survive in it then.
That Thing is “The Great Guiding Glitch” of that moment and the costliest at that stand, which is why it is the most difficult to attain it. But mark my words, today or tomorrow, you’ll have to spend on it anyhow!

The choice is yours!

Either you start putting all your efforts in buying it that moment itself!

Or you wait for its price to lower and lose something else until then!

Or might be you want to divert yourself from this now, and then come back to a more complicated version of the same situation, years later!

Or least probable but most tricky option,

You might plot, plan and execute to bring a revolution resulting into your evolution forever, manipulating the complete system, the complete market statistics, the complete life, by getting to know yourself deep deeper deepest inside!

Grateful to allthe Great Guiding Glitches,

Hiti Sinha

Mighty, Majestic and Mystic

A life unlived is worth living the most!
A life unrealised is topped by the frost,
That hides soul beneath the gleaming sheet,
And pretends as if the life in life is lost!

This is how we have been living. All our lives, we keep learning and keep evolving. Sometimes, at school, at religious places, at homes, at trips and then at offices.
But, let me ask you, “How many times, did we really love how to live?”. Moreover, “How many times did we feel, that we lack the sense of living in life?”. Or must I say, how many times did we feel, “What if I could manage my life a little better?”

Drink me in such that I dissolve in you,
Says the life, through the mist and dew…
Breathe me in such that I respire in you,
Whispers the life, amidst shades of red and blue…
Clutch me, hide me and cuddle me warm,
Pleaded the life, floating like beer’s barm…
Kiss me to life and make me peacefully calm,
Assured the life, “Trust me, I’ll do no harm” …

Well, technically Oxford defines Life as, “The condition that distinguishes animals and plants from inorganic matter, including the capacity for growth, reproduction, functional activity, and continual change preceding death.

Exactly, preceding death, not dying inside simultaneously. Sometimes, it feels like the day and night burn into ashes and like a bedsheet settling to cover us completely and crushing us within. But is that the truth? Would that have been the truth, it would have stayed forever, for each and every moment. But, it could not last, not as long as life, which is truth.
When we define something, there’s no guarantee we understand it. When we feel it as well, we cannot assure that we believe in it. But yes, when we live it each moment, we know, understand, realize and believe it. That’s why we say, “We live our lives”. Don’t we?

A strong beautiful soulful monument,
The man’s creation or the man himself!
Mighty as their reflection, both aspire to see,
Majestic is there after what they want to be,
Mystic end to life adds an impish glee… 
That’s why both the creations are so prolific,
Gradually mighty, majestic and mystic!

Yes, the stages, the steps, and the phases of life are the ones, most important. When we understand them, we understand their importance and that’s when we tread along. Yes,
be it constructing a legendary monument or architecting our own life, they elevate us through the same stairs and same steps. At each step, all that changes is the motive of stepping it over

In the first primary stage, the motive is MightyPower, also known as Self Importance in the Society that ranges between variant degrees of self-faith, self-confidence, self-respect, egotism, narcissism and egomania. This is based in a fundamental need that is Identification of an Individual. The only problem is that, this need is distorted by the circumstances leading to the change in degree.

The attention they both draw,
And the life they both live within!
Common are the paths trodden by their steps,
And the deep repentance for all their sins!

The second stage then holds Majestic Attitude as the motive. Like the levels of staircase, by the time a person elevated to this stage, gets the contemplation of notions of Importance, Respect and Power in Life. Not as straight forward as the earlier one, this tricky stage has the ability to create an illusion of what we want to see. Once recognized, it becomes our significant need to raise and nurture majestic attitude, also known as Influential orientation. Well, partly it is borne out of the lessons that harsh experience taught at the previous step. This step broadens the Gaps between, “What we are?”, “What we want to become?”, “What we want to be seen as?”, “What are we symbolized by, within conversations people have?”, and “What is it in us that makes people look up to us?”

A personality is earned never by a down payment,
Its built by annuity paid by each change we inculcate…
Some reforms we make consume night long lament,
That’s how each and every piece of us we assimilate

As the second stage ends with a resonant synchronized notion of ourselves from all the windows of all our lives: A notion that’s well collaged, sorted, thought-over and constant. Yes, then it is the time to put forward the final step. This step of Mystic Bliss, also known as Soulful delight, holds an elevated experience beyond rational reasoning, and much beyond focused voluntary endeavor. The feet reaching this step denote within the person, contentment towards responsibilities, gratitude towards life, satisfaction towards time, absence of expectations, evaporation of grudges and most importantly sustenance with acceptance. The motive of this step is realization of the truth, the eternal peace, the bigger perspective, the wiser objective, the firmer instinctive and the oneness with the world.

All that goes up today has to come down someday,
Even the rising vapors with heat do rain one day…
Holding onto something is not at all forever,
That’s why they say, “Never say never” …
So, do good this day as today is new,
For all that you do comes back to you…
All that exists in nature is absolutely ballistic,
Undoubtedly it is, Mighty, Majestic and mystic!

Persisting Mighty Intent, Majestic Times, and Mystic Glint
Hiti Sinha

Brain & Brawn of Memories

What is it exactly that differentiates a person from an animal. Well, some say it is socialization, others answer its culture, and the rest believe that it is our values. Well I firmly believe, it is our memories, cherished or undernourished. Yes, undoubtedly we socialize more than animals do. We have a better culture and values than them too. But is it not a fact, that we pertain all this only because we have their imprints on our learning and memory.

Echo of the times you laughed openly,
Remembrance of the first touch you adored,

Retention of what your experiences coached you,

Evocation of the evolution of your soul!

Nothing they are in sizes ans masses,

But occupy big space in your brain,

And bigger in your mind!

Before I continue, I am sure there’s one more concern that needs complete clarity. The controversy is “Whether the act of pertaining memories is healthy for the soul? Is it under our control?”. In my belief, this controversy had risen up mainly by two factors. The first one is the crucial fact that “Memories make us as much as we make memories”. The second is the transforming expansive effect that sharp extreme memories create in our minds, which not only affects our decision making, but our worldly perception too.

The point is, if we understand how big is the case, we might be able to deal with its brevity and sought the controversy too. “Memory”, derived from a Latin word “memor” – meaning mindful. In other words, memory means a state of being conscious or aware about something. Ask yourself randomly, whether it is about winning an award, or being stabbed in the back, or an instance of your family member in need of you, or the next best thing about to happen to you, or the cost that you pay for any of these. Will you prefer to be well informed and aware about it or to be surprised by the moment itself?

Well, this is the spirit of mindfulness. It is the great power of your conscious that it needs no other guide, if you have always traced the path it had been guiding. These memories are the ones that make you up exactly what you are, how you are and who you are. So it is a part of you that builds you in parts. It’s the power that is immense.

Exactly at this moment,
Listen to yourself reading this,
And you will surely find eyes and ears lent to you.
Who is it sensing you when you are reading this.
It is your mind.
The mind, who knows the purpose of reading this.
And with this deep down…
It is feeding your memory with all the significant chips of these words.
There you go!

You memory here pertains it!
The next time you think about your memory,
Read a fact about it or,
Randomly instruct it to remember something.
It will pay you the cost for these chips.

Memories work no different than your portfolio, which represents you. Just as your portfolio holds snaps of all that you’ve done and has its influence on your present day, memories hold too. Well the way, you choose projects to work so as to be presented in your portfolio, you choose moments to live so as to get registered as memories in your mind. Both carry your essence and both embrace your presence in the world.  

So the question of prior importance drifts from,

Whether the act of pertaining memories is healthy for the soul? Is it under our control?” to other bigger question which is,

If we are the one who create, store, manipulate, discard, update our memories, then why are we sometimes feel ruled over by them or why do we not rule over them always?”

The answer is simple, two things that are complementary parts of a whole cannot rule over each other. They either rule together or they fight a battle against each other. Obviously the former earns benefits to both and the latter one leaves none defeated.

You and your mindful piece of memories are these two parts exactly.

Now the last point is “How to rule together?”
The answer to this is something you may not remember, but your memory definitely remembers because you guys have already executed it many a times before. Manage it similar to your portfolio,

“The ones that carry happiness and courage, embrace them with pride as a booster”
“The ones that carry agony and pain, hold them softly, caress them until they get well soon”

“The ones that have made you stone, grab them rub against yourself and shape your soul with them”

“The ones that have broken you up in pieces, encircle yourself with them to protect your softness”

“The ones that churned and stripped you, wear them in an elegant way, that defines your style.”

The only thing all in all – Everything chopped, broken, burnt, spoiled thing has its use. The trick is you should know it or learnt it!

These innocent memories are the same, they look up to you to be used in the most optimized way, offer you your restored skills as tools, and believe in you as their only sculpture!    

Doing justice to my memories,
Hiti Sinha

Somewhere between selfness and selflessness

Am I writing it for me or for you?

Are you reading it for me or for you?

Who are we living for and whosoever it is, is s/he really contented with the way we are living?

What is it that confuses us while making decisions, even when we have strong values?

How do we choose between right and the good? Is the choice always the same?

Are you, what you are?

This indeed is… the BIG question strolling around the motivational sessions in today’s world and trolling around in the pages of social media today. What an Irony!

Are there times when, it’s not the fear of choosing the wrong but the fear of not choosing the right that overpowers our sanity of making decisions aptly? Well, if not with you, at least it happens with me.

A prayer about one’s stay in your life,

So that you live peacefully together…

A piece of food that you donate,

Because you don’t like it much….

A determination to fight difficulties,

For you need to stand for loved ones…

A wish that you bare the pain…

Instead of watching the other one bare it!

If not “Somewhere between selfness and selflessness”, then what is it in all these situations that holds us back from understanding who are we really prioritizing: us or ours?

Moreover, what exactly the correct thing to do? Shall we adjust and compromise our opinions, lifestyle and desires for the people we care for? Or shall we stay strict and stern towards our values and decisions against the people caring for us? Not just you and me, it an active dilemma for all of us!

The answer to this, I believe lies in the answer of a simpler and a more fundamental question, which is:
Are you living (not just alive) because of your dear ones or are they because of you? Answering this with an absolute honesty, determines which of these is the cause and the effect of your life. Now, your smartness doesn’t really need my word to understand that always, be it Science or Art, “We alter the cause, that gets reflected in the effect.”

So, here we are with a notion of importance of our notions. Not all the time and not for all, do we stay hungry and feed the one begging nearby us. What does it take to decide, whom do you feed in a bunch of beggars?

For most, it’s an instinct that’s triggered deep in them!

For some, it’s logical reasoning for who needs it more!

For a few, it’s a psychological lean towards a particular sect of society!

My question is Why is it not to put ourselves in each of their shoes?

Perhaps deep inside, we are too reluctant to even imagine ourselves in such a situation! But it needs courage to understand anything and everything beyond a short sighted perception. And I must say, all of us are pretty well determined to find solutions to our problems but pretty well optimal to find solutions for a third person. The only difference between the two is perception. The short one is more focused and therefore highly determined. However, the other one is a distant and thus highly analyzed.

Kudos to you, because I’m sure you are good at both conditionally. And your fittest survival until now in this cut-throat world, approves of it the best. The only thing is when to utilize which approach is what makes you the king of decisions of your life! Be it for you or for your loved ones! And yes,

You thinking for you is NOT selfishness,

You holding onto people is NOT self-sameness,

Living a life that serves both equally,

Is somewhere between selfness and selflessness!

Why fight for our self-respect, self-esteem or against it? Why hold self-criticism or self-scrutiny as per people’s opinion? Or why always stand to be self-giving without self-loving?

Loving to live somewhere between selfness and selflessness,

Hiti Sinha

Dearest Emptiness

With no words to express myself, rather the inner me,
I go on writing this letter to the dearest “Emptiness”…
The emptiness that lies folded beside me, inside me!
It says, “Your success and Failure doesn’t bother me
If not me, who could define what a companion is!
Your time changed, but I never did change…
Even you changed, but all I did is accepted!

Yes, such was the contribution of this “Emptiness”, much more than I could realize, and much bigger than I could believe. Honestly, all the years while I had been complaining and grudging about my loneliness, never did I understand how this emptiness dissolved in my solitude.

I know you would say “Think Practically, A companion has to be living thing, first! I understand. I understand!” That’s how I used to think too. But what if I ask you,
Is the numb throbbing in the silence not enough to be its heartbeat,
Or is the essence of enveloping air not enough to be its skin,
What else does it need to be approved of a life?
Is it the physical body, that a corpse possesses?
Or is it, the communication that even plants strive to prove!
What is it, that stops us from accepting that even in our loneliness, we are not alone. Would that have been the case, “Why and who do we talk to inside?”. Tell me, “Who is it that you wait to get your tears wiped even in the locked room?”.

This emptiness never gets depleted. It stays forever. It contracts and hides within when many high-profile contacts, success awards and moments of glam get added to your life. Why? Because it knows by your ignorance that you don’t want it right now, and enjoys watching you enjoy them. Then, later when you fail or get stabbed, in the dark moments of your life, it expands and cuddle you to envelop and isolate you from the rest of the world, so that you see the world as it is, without a single perception.
And then….
Most of us avoid it, and distract ourselves. Isn’t it?
Some of us fight it, and believe we killed it. Isn’t it?
A few of us accept it and wait for our time to change.
My question is why don’t we carry it gracefully?
This generation makes me the immensely proud, when they never hesitate to accept their flaws. They carry it so elegantly and boldly, that no wonder the flaw seems to be the new fashion in its only edition.

Why just sitting depressed in a corner under the staircase, or looking down to the hazy world from top floor through the empty bottle or walking alone by a sea shore viewing the setting sun, or fighting the slaps of wind over the face out of the window over a road trip….do we find and talk to this Emptiness?
What should then stop us from accepting, embracing and glorifying this “Emptiness” beside us, beneath us, within us? Could we ever be so loyal and supporting to anyone as “Emptiness” is!
Loving and protecting my Emptiness
Hiti Sinha